[ The gaping hole where there should be choice is nothing but a cavernous void, jagged edges the only thing left from where it's been ripped out. A used-to-be, maybe, once upon a time. Rug-pulled dizziness hit him that day in Vik's chair, an ugly truth exposed, and it feels a lot like he's been playing catch-up ever since. Treading water; that's the best way he can describe it. Treading water while watching a monster wave curl higher and higher over him, ready to take him under.
'Clinic in Sweden,' filters into his thoughts and the reaction that plays out over his features is acutely visceral, even in this dreamscape. Hellman's words given the kind of treatment they deserve. That's not a choice, not an option. Molars squeezed tightly together and muscles rippling at his jaw, he shakes his head, eventually. Worst part is he can imagine things worse than that, could see the cold, scientific interest the man had taken. Falling into hands that would spend the rest of time prodding and poking at his brain, at Johnny?
No, there's no choice. No choice but to take this head on. ]
no subject
'Clinic in Sweden,' filters into his thoughts and the reaction that plays out over his features is acutely visceral, even in this dreamscape. Hellman's words given the kind of treatment they deserve. That's not a choice, not an option. Molars squeezed tightly together and muscles rippling at his jaw, he shakes his head, eventually. Worst part is he can imagine things worse than that, could see the cold, scientific interest the man had taken. Falling into hands that would spend the rest of time prodding and poking at his brain, at Johnny?
No, there's no choice. No choice but to take this head on. ]
Where'd you go? ...if you had a choice.
[ 'If you had the freedom to' goes unsaid. ]